Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Struggles

I don't know what went wrong today- it was a very tough day. I struggled from the very beginning to get going- even after exercising- and felt unmotivated and overwhelmed (a bad combination). I didn't write my list last night, so I didn't have that to help get me focused. I don't even know what caused it- I've been feeling really tired and like I'm fighting something off, so maybe that is to blame. I was also worried because I still have a lot of calendars to sell. Last night, after blogging, I think I started to get a little overwhelmed thinking of how much we need to grow if we are to become a national charity. I need people to help- to be more precise- I need staff. But without money, where does one get staff? I'm trying to get another intern. Volunteers are great for events and short term, but they are busy with their own lives and can't commit to what we really need. So I felt lost today- I had a lot of work but could barely get anything done. The struggle went on for a while, then I thought of what mom had told me a few years ago about the idea of winning the day- she got that from a training program she took and talked about it a lot. I wanted to get something productive out of the day, so I went back to my usual baby steps routine. I thought of 2 small tasks that I needed to get done- I did those, then I thought of 3 slightly bigger tasks that needed done and I did those. Then I went back to a couple of other small tasks. Things didn't suddenly become all peachy today, but I did get some work accomplished and that is the most important thing. The day started out like it would be lost, but it was salvaged. I know it is OK to have days like this, but I just wish it didn't happen. I wish I could be enthusiastic and motivated everyday and not get overwhelmed, how wonderful that would be!

I know there is so much else to talk about, but I'm tired again. I'm less tired than Ive been at night, so that is a good sign. But it is probably best if I make it an early night so I can be bright and focused tomorrow. It is 12:05 and my goal is to be lites out in 15 minutes. What an early night! I also have to write my list- that thing is so important to me, especially when I have moments like today. Until tomorrow friends..

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