Wednesday, May 27, 2009


Yesterday, the Cleveland Indians were down by 7 runs heading into the ninth inning. They rallied for eight runs to win the game, 6 of those runs coming with two outs. Why am I sharing this? Because it is a reminder of never giving up- nothing is ever over until it is truly over. When things appear hopeless, one has to keep going- keep working, keep fighting until you achieve the results that you want.

I was struggling this morning. I went to check my emails before exercising which is a lousy idea and I was greeted with an issue that will need some time to resolve. I didn't get around to exercising because I decided to go straight to work. I only intended to spend a couple of hours on date auction sponsorship, but I ended up spending the entire day working on obtaining financial sponsors. This morning, I got an email rejection from a bank in regards to date auction sponsorship. I could feel the anxiety starting to set in about our sponsorship situation, so I decided to take a break and visited the Indians website to read more about their win- it really inspired me and within a few minutes, I was focused again and went back to work on research and contacting new businesses. I don't have any good news to report yet, but there were definitely a number of organizations that expressed interest, so we have to wait and give them an opportunity to review the info.

I wasn't happy with myself that I spent all day working on the date auction sponsors. There are so many other things that need attention, all important things as well. I knew that I had other things to work on today, but I wanted to keep going until I reached someone who committed to sponsoring our event. It is really tough sometimes when you work hard on things, but don't have anything to show for it, except a busy looking spreadsheet and a lot of sent emails. Our date auction is such an awesome event and is a perfect fit for companies looking to reach the young professional market in Boston. If I was in the positions that some of these companies are and I heard about our event, I would jump on it instantly. Even when things are financially difficult, one still has to market their business and this is a great marketing opportunity and they will also be supporting a childrens charity at the same time- it is a terrific partnership. It is frustrating to have this wonderful event, but still be lagging on financial sponsors. I know that the economic situation is to blame for a large part, but the world still is functioning and there is still money out there. I need to keep reaching out, but I could also do with recommendations for people to contact who would be interested in sponsoring. So, if you know anyone who would like to get involved, please let me know. I need help.

Anyways, it is almost 1am and I'm off to bed. I need to write my list and actually follow it tomorrow. I can't spend the entire day working on one thing. I'm going to a networking event in Boston, so hopefully I will make some connections for the date auction. I'll keep you posted. Until tomorrow friends..

Thursday, May 21, 2009


So what's new? Well, I've been slipping with my blogging again- too many late nights out at events- lots of fun events though! There were no fantastic revelations these last few days, the checks for tens of thousand of dollars have not rolled in, but I've been working steadily on auction items and sponsors. I've also signed up more singles to be auctioned off- we have an awesome line-up so far of really cool single guys and ladies. I don't have any positive news in regards to date auction financial sponsors, but I do have more committments for auction items.

I've always believed in being graceful under pressure and to always take the high road. It doesn't really matter what other people's actions are, I have no control over that, but what does matter is my reaction. Hurt never heals hurt. When someone says things that are hurtful or acts in a hurtful manner- reacting the same way never improves the situation. It doesn't even make one feel any better. I made a decision this afternoon in a personal situation, when I made that decision I knew it wasn't the easy way out, I had to change a decision I had already made a week ago, but my instinct told me that it was the right thing to do. My decision changed after some discussion with the person involved. There are certain things in regards to this personal situation that I will never know or understand, but it doesn't really matter- it doesn't change the outcome.

I believe in forgiveness- not for everything, but for many things. It is too exhausting and draining to hold onto feelings of anger and hurt. Life is too short for that. In this situation, I had already let go of those feelings days ago, so it was easier to change my mind today.

I want my life and the lives of those around me to be full of happiness. I have a huge amount of stress (as many people do)- with both work and personal life, but I'm also very happy- I'm so grateful for my family that I adore, my wonderful friends, my work, my health- there is so much to be happy about. I remember the days when things weren't like this, so when I see people who are missing certain things in their life, my natural istinct is to do what I can to make things a little easier, a little happier for them. Today, when I made that decision, I did something that made things happier for someone else, even though it wasn't the easiest choice for me. Tonight, I'm glad that I did.

Anyways, enough on that topic. I'm tired, it is almost 1am. I had a mini mountain of things that I was going to do when I got home tonight, but I didn't do anything. Tomorrow will be a good day to catch up on some things since most people leave work early for the holiday weekend and I probably won't be able to reach many people. Until next time friends..

Tuesday, May 19, 2009


Well, it's the second day of a new week (3rd day to be precise, but who really counts Sunday as the first day of the week- after all, it is called the weekend??), things are off to a good start. I feel like I've been through some mini traumas with work and personal issues recently, but now I'm emerging. Last night and today, I actually feel better than I've done in a little while. I don't have any exciting work news that has brought this on, but my spirits are feeling lifted. In regards to work, I was feeling like I was personally failing in regards to fundraising, but I'm recognizing that our fundraising struggles is not because I'm doing a bad job- it's because of the economic difficulties. It isn't about making excuses, it is about understanding the situation. I'm going to obviously keep working hard at fundraising- there is no other choice other than working super hard to bring in the dollars, but I also need to not blame myself for our struggles and I also need to appreciate everything that we are doing. We have awesome auction items, we already have sponsors for events, we have committments for calendar sponsors, we have hotties already signed up for the date auction, I'm networking- I do need to do more outreach, we've applied for some new grants this year- there are a lot of good things going on.

What else am I working on? Tomorrow, I need to send over some updates and changes to our web host. I want to change something on our event page- I keep looking at a certain thing and I feel like it needs to be improved. We're going to be doing a raffle on a Boston harbor cruise next month- we have a beauty pageant winner who is so nicely volunteering her time and will be selling raffle tickets on the cruise, which is awesome. I need to work on getting raffle items. I'm already having a hard enough time getting raffle items for the date auction, so I'm not sure exactly what I'm going to be raffling off in June, but we'll figure it out. I also need to keep working on event sponsors and auction item donors for both events. And I need to do our May newsletter and work on reaching more police/fire departments.

I'm so relieved that I'm feeling better- things were rough lately both personally and professionally. It was the combination of both that really got to me. It is awful to feel so sad about things that one physically hurts. But now I feel like I'm shining again. What turned things around? I took time for myself- I did a little bit of shopping, got my hair done, spent some time with my sis and mom, talked to a lot of friends who are such a remarkable source of comfort, went to an awesome event in Boston last night with a close friend, went out with other friends tonight, did some house cleaning over the weekend and I also let myself feel sad at times- I didn't try to hide my feelings, but I also worked on keeping things in perspective and appreciating all the good that I have in my life. Things improved each day and today I felt back to normal- back to my usual fighting spirit that I rely on for work and I felt happy.

Anyways, I'm off to bed. First, I need to write my list- I was slipping for a bit with list writing, but I'm back on track. Until tomorrow friends..

Friday, May 15, 2009


I've been really lacking with my blogging lately- I'm sorry about that. This week has been really stressful with work, particularly with fundraising, and I've been really anxious about where our financial support is actually going to be coming from for the remainder of the year. I need to cast the net wider and find new avenues of financial support.

It is so important to have caring and supportive people in your life. I always appreciate the love and support that I get from my family and my awesome friends, but there are particular times that make you feel even more grateful. There was a very upsetting event that happened to me last night- it is a personal matter and not worth discussing in detail, but it left me very upset. I was able to reach out to my family and friends and it made all the difference. It is so wonderful to know that when things are sad and difficult you have people who care enough about you that you can call them anytime and they will be there. I will never take that for granted because I remember the days when I didn't have friends like that in my life. As much as I write about how important my work is to me, how happy it makes me and how desperately I want Project Smile to become a national charity, I also know that just as important is the relationships and friendships that one has in their life.

Things have been a struggle lately- they're always a struggle, so that is hardly new, but lately it seems that I'm on the downside of the rollercoaster more than I am on top. However, I feel that things are going to turn a corner and we are going to enter a better phase. I feel like I've been slipping on certain work things a bit, partly because I have been so stressed with financial issues, but I'm going to get back on a decent schedule and focus on all the small things that need to get done instead of getting overwhelmed with the bigger picture. Small is beautiful!

There are other things to talk about, but I'm getting tired and I can't remember. So unti next time friends..

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Upside of the Roller Coaster

Well, today was an improvement. When I woke up, I wasn't even going to do the leisurely breakfast that I decided upon last night. I was going to start work right after exercising and do my usual breakfast while working routine, but then I decided that I needed to stick to my original plan- I had my delicious breakfast and read the newspaper and then started work- it made such a difference. I don't even know why it mattered so much, probably because it was a change in routine and a chance to just relax and really get things back on track. Then, the good news started rolling in- two financial sponsors are back on board and we got some awesome auction items in. The Southwest airlines tickets arrived and we received cool items from Jay Leno- an autographed children's book that he wrote, autographed Tonight Show t-shirt and autographed photo. How cool is that?

There was a funny moment though this morning. I hadn't looked at my email for about an hour, I checked it and saw two emails from a local company that sponsored our event last year. I decided to first open the email that came in last- it stated that they would be sponsoring our anniversary event at the $250 level- same as last year. It also said "correction" on it. I was happy to have the sponsorship. I then checked the email that came in 20 minutes early- it said they would be sponsoring at the $550 level. I was relieved that I had opened the correct email first. It would have been disappointing to have been thinking we were getting the double amount, but this way I was already happy.

I was working on contacting calendar sponsors and following up with other things that I hadn't gotten to earlier this week. Yelp is back on board as a sponsor for our date auction and they are going to help recruit some single guys and ladies to auction off as well and donate some items for our gift bags. Our official PS tote bags have already been ordered. I am really excited to see them.

I was thinking today when I was driving about what a roller coaster this job is. Today was the upside of the roller coaster- the last 3 days were the downside. I wish there was a way to take it less personally, to let the bad times have less of an effect, but I don't think there really is. It's a job that I take personally and I think that to be good at it, you do need to take it personally. I could do with getting less stressed and anxious, but I haven't really found much of a way to do that. All I do is go back to baby steps, which is pretty much what I did today and that always helps.

Well, tiredness has just hit me, I was a bundle of energy a few minutes ago and now I don't know what just happened- I feel like I can't keep my little eyes open. I was going to go and send some more emails, then sort some stuffed animals- now I don't even feel like getting up to switch off the office computer. I know there's other things that I wanted to write about, but I can't remember now. Anyways, I'm off to bed- it is so early too, only 11:57! Until tomorrow friends..


Its 1am and I should be in bed, not starting to write my blog. I just got home a little while ago. I'm really struggling with work. I should be happy because there are other things in my life that are really fun and going well, but things are tough with work and I don't know how to fix it. I seem to have run into a roadblock in terms of fundraising and it is causing a great deal of stress. We have money going out on a regular base and a insufficient amount coming in right now. I know that in terms of what other businesses and individuals are going through, I really shouldn't be complaining. However, this isn't really a comparison game- the fact remains that we are not raising enough money right now. I'm so anxious and can't seem to focus and I feel like I'm moving at snail's pace. I feel like I haven't accomplished anything these past two days and it makes me want to cry. I have these big visions of where we need to be, what we should be accomplishing and right now, we're not there. I don't know what I'm doing wrong or if things are just really that tough right now in terms of fundraising. I wish that it was something that I was doing wrong, that way I could fix it and things would improve. I do know that I need to be more aggressive- find new companies, new sponsors. Our two events are so awesome that it doesn't seem like it should be so hard to get financial support.

I'm so behind on things this week, it isn't even funny. Part of me wants to take a day off, relax and regroup, but then I need all the time I can get to really work on things and be productive. I know I'm in panic mode tonight and that nothing beneficial is going to come of this. I haven't exercised yesterday or today and that doesn't help the situation. I haven't even written my list. Things started to head really south on Friday- I was already feeling stressed, but then I went to the bank to deposit a few small checks and got a bit of a shock when I looked at our balance. I don't know why it was so shocking, I always know approximately how much money we have in the bank, but there is something about seeing it in black and white in your cold little hand that is shocking. It sent me into mini meltdown mode and I haven't gotten back on track.

I do need to stop and focus on the good things that are going on- we have six months of our calendar committed to, we are getting really cool auction items for both events, we are halfway to the amount of gift certificates needed for the date auction, we now work with 146 police/fire departments, we have bachelors/ettes already signing up, and so on- there is a lot of good stuff happening. But that is really hard to keep in mind when there is so much pressure to raise money and I'm not producing.

Well, I should go to sleep. I don't know what to do about tomorrow- taking the day off could be a good idea, I do feel like I need a little bit of time away to refocus. However, taking a break when things are down is not a good thing. Remember that old saying about when you fall off a horse, you need to get right back on immediately. Well, I feel like I've fallen off my work horse, so tomorrow I need to dig deep and get back on. I don't think that taking the day off will actually help me feel any better. Perhaps I will have a leisurely breakfast instead. I usually eat breakfast while I'm working, so it might be nice tomorrow to have an egg, warm tomato, ham, cream cheese and French roll with my tea and read the paper for a little, then start working. And of course, making sure I exercise first. I think this sounds like a good plan- actually feel like making that right now. I'm actually starting to feel a bit better now- it helps to come up with a plan- even if it is a pretty simple plan. Tomorrow will be a better day and I am leaving these two miserable work days behind.

I'm really glad I blogged- I was feeling so miserable about work, I wasn't even going to blog, but I didn't blog last night, so I wanted to make sure I wrote something tonight and this has helped me relax. Until tomorrow friends..